What to Wear to an Engagement Party or Rehearsal Dinner
Wear a knee length or midi dress, or a tailored blazer with wide leg pants, in a deep color that is not white, to a rehearsal dinner. The Navy Wrap Dress, Olga, at $695 and the Navy Tailored Jacquard Blazer, Lucy, at $680 with the Navy Wide Leg Pants, Greta, at $610 both meet that brief.
A rehearsal dinner sits one step below the wedding, so the dress code is usually cocktail or semi formal. Every piece in this guide is cut and finished in our atelier in Pozarevac, Serbia, ships free in the US in 2 to 5 days, and can be returned within 30 days with no questions asked.
Wear a knee to midi dress in a fabric with some weight to a rehearsal dinner or an engagement party, with a heel or a polished flat. The usual dress code is semi formal or cocktail, one step below the wedding. Leave white to the woman getting married. From November, choose a coat you are happy to be photographed in.
This guide answers both. It sets the dress code for each role, gives the midi dress, the wrap dress, and the blazer with wide-leg pants that carry each venue, and ends with the heels you can stand in for three hours and the coat over all of it.
Shop the pieces in this story: Wedding Guest Dresses and Jumpsuits, Blazers, and Pants. Complete size runs are listed first.
The dress code: one level below the wedding
A rehearsal dinner sits one step below the wedding on the formality scale, and an engagement party sits one step below that unless the invitation says otherwise. Semi-formal or cocktail is the usual card. That means knee to midi, a fabric with some weight, a shoe with a heel or a polished flat, and no white unless you are the one getting married.
The emotional brief is simpler than the dress code: be supportive, not competitive. You want to look like yourself at your best, to be in the photographs without pulling focus, and to be comfortable enough to help with the seating chart, the toasts, and the aunt who needs a ride.
The guest: a midi dress that works at any table
The guest has the widest latitude and the least time, and usually dresses straight from work. A midi dress in a dark color with a little texture solves it. The Green Lace Cocktail Dress, Jody, is deep forest green lace with a sheer illusion neckline over a V of lace, short lace sleeves, a fitted bodice, and a draped skirt to the knee. Green stands apart from the navy and bordeaux at the table and reads as celebration.
If the party is in a restaurant with a long table and low light, black with a detail at the neckline is the other reliable answer. The Black Elegant Midi Dress, Rina, has a square neckline edged in fine white piping, short sleeves, a fitted bodice, and an A-line skirt to mid-calf. The piping is the only decoration; it frames your face across a table and asks nothing else of you.
The sister or the best friend: the wrap dress and the toast
If you are giving a toast, you will stand up in front of 40 people with a glass in one hand and your phone in the other. You need a dress that sits where you put it. The wrap dress was made for this. The Navy Wrap Dress, Olga, has a notch lapel collar, cap sleeves, a wrap front closed with a gold buckle at the waist, a row of small buttons down the skirt, and a knee-length hem. Navy photographs as considered next to the couple, and the wrap adjusts to you, so the fit at the waist is yours, not the pattern’s.
The sister of the bride has one extra rule: do not match the bride by accident. Ask what she is wearing. If she is in ivory, you are in navy, green, or bordeaux. If she has chosen color, you can go darker or go to black.
The bride-to-be: ivory without the gown
You are the reason everyone came, and this is the first time you dress as a bride without wearing the dress. Ivory, cream, and champagne are yours tonight. The balance is celebratory and photogenic without competing with the wedding to come, and comfortable enough for three hours of hugs.
For a restaurant rehearsal dinner, the Ivory Short Dress, Rebeka, is a fitted ivory sheath with a soft V neckline and sheer cape sleeves that float from the shoulder in long open panels. The sleeves are removable, so the ceremony version and the dancing version are the same dress. It is lined.
For a backyard engagement party in September, ivory with black dots photographs as bridal and reads as fun. The White Polka Dot Strapless Dress, Melissa, is a satin corset midi in an ivory ground with black polka dots: a straight neckline, a halter strap you can remove, a fitted bodice, and an A-line skirt to mid-calf. Wear it with a low block heel on grass.
If you would rather not wear a dress at all, the ivory suit is the quieter version of the same idea, and it works for a daytime party or a rooftop in October. The Ivory Pearl Detail Blazer, Agatha, is a single-breasted ivory blazer with notch lapels, two pearl buttons, and flap pockets edged with pearls. Worn over the Ivory High Waisted Wide Leg Pants, Agatha, with their wide waistband, metal buckle, and front crease, it is a bridal-adjacent look you will wear again after the honeymoon.
The blazer and wide-leg pants, for the guest who prefers not to wear a dress
A blazer with wide-leg pants is correct at every rehearsal dinner and engagement party we can think of, and it is the first choice for a rooftop, where wind and a skirt do not mix. The Navy Tailored Jacquard Blazer, Lucy, is a navy jacquard blazer with notch lapels, a single decorative clasp at the front, flap pockets, and a sculpted waist. It is lined. Over the Navy Wide Leg Pants, Greta, high-waisted with an asymmetric wrap front and silver eyelets threaded with red lace and a small anchor charm at the waist, it is a tonal navy column with one small detail to talk about.
By venue: restaurant, backyard, rooftop
| Venue | What the room does | What to wear | The pieces |
|---|---|---|---|
| Restaurant | Low light, seated for hours, faces close together | A dark midi with texture at the neckline and a heel you can sit in | Rina black midi, Jody green lace |
| Backyard | Grass, daylight into string lights, standing and moving | A midi with a defined waist, a print or dots, a block heel | Melissa polka dot, Amanda floral |
| Rooftop | Wind, cold by 9 p.m., standing with a glass | A blazer with wide-leg pants, or a dress under a light coat, a closed shoe | Lucy blazer with Greta pants, Emma teal jacquard coat |
For the backyard party as a guest, the Floral Elegant Midi Dress, Amanda, is a sleeveless midi with a draped cowl neckline, a pink and orange floral on a cream ground, a belt with a buckle, and an A-line skirt. It is fully lined, and the print is bright enough for daylight without being loud after dark.
The coat over it, in November
By November the arrival is part of the evening, and so is the sidewalk afterward. The coat you wear over a lace dress should have a waist and a proper collar. The Black Wool Wrap Coat, Nicole, is black long-fiber wool at 480 grams per square meter, double-breasted with a wide collar, a self belt with a buckle, patch pockets, and a midi skirt that flares from the waist. It is lined in Bemberg and dry clean only, like all our coats.
For the rooftop in October, when a wool coat is too much and no coat is too little, the Teal Floral Jacquard Light Coat, Emma, is a black light coat with teal flowers woven in metallic thread, a shirt collar, a tie belt, and a knee-length flared skirt. It shimmers a little under string lights, which is the point.
Heels you can stand in for three hours
Every woman at a rehearsal dinner stands more than she sits: arrival, cocktails, photographs, toasts, goodbyes. A block heel of 2 to 3 inches or a pointed flat in leather is the right answer. Avoid a stiletto on grass and on old wood floors. At a restaurant, a slingback with a low heel holds through dinner. Buy the shoe before the dress if you have to choose; the dress will forgive you and the shoe will not.
Fit, care, and the week before
Order the dress two weeks out, not two days, and sit down in it with the shoes on. The lace, crepe, and satin pieces above are lined and cut with ease at the hip, so they sit through a two-hour dinner without pulling. Everything here except the coats is machine washable on a gentle cycle, air dried, and steamed or ironed on low. Returns are accepted within 30 days, no questions asked, and every order ships from California.
Related reading: What to Wear to Your Own Engagement Party, What to Wear When Meeting His Parents for the First Time, and What to Wear to a Fall Wedding as a Guest.
Frequently asked questions
What should a female guest wear to a rehearsal dinner?
One level below the wedding: a knee to midi dress in a dark color with texture, or a blazer with wide-leg pants, with a heel you can stand in for three hours. The Green Lace Cocktail Dress, Jody, handles a restaurant; the Navy Tailored Jacquard Blazer, Lucy, over the Navy Wide Leg Pants, Greta, handles a rooftop. Leave white and ivory to the bride-to-be.
What do I wear to an engagement party at a restaurant?
A restaurant means low light, a long table, and a lot of sitting, so choose a midi in a fabric that photographs in candlelight and does not crease when you sit. Lace in forest green or bordeaux, black with a detail at the neckline, or a navy wrap dress all work. Add a low heel or a slingback and one piece of jewelry near the face.
Can the bride-to-be wear white to her engagement party?
Yes. Ivory, cream, and champagne are yours at your engagement party and your rehearsal dinner; they read as bridal without competing with the wedding dress. The Ivory Short Dress, Rebeka, with its removable sheer cape sleeves, the White Polka Dot Strapless Dress, Melissa, for a backyard, or the ivory Agatha blazer and pants for a daytime party all hold that balance.
What should I not wear to a rehearsal dinner?
White or ivory unless you are the one getting married, denim, anything you would wear to the office unchanged, and anything more formal than the wedding itself. Skip a stiletto if the venue has grass or old wood floors, and a print louder than the table flowers. The aim is supportive, not competitive: look like yourself at your best and let the couple be the photograph.
Can I wear pants to a rehearsal dinner or engagement party?
Yes, and on a rooftop or in wind they are the better choice. A tailored blazer over high-waisted wide-leg pants in a single dark color reads as evening when the fabric has some weight and the shoe is polished. The Navy Tailored Jacquard Blazer, Lucy, with the Navy Wide Leg Pants, Greta, is the guest version; the ivory Agatha pair is the version for the bride-to-be.
What coat do I wear over a rehearsal dinner dress in November?
A wool coat with a waist and a proper collar, because the arrival and the sidewalk afterward are part of the evening and of the photographs. The Black Wool Wrap Coat, Nicole, in 480 gram long-fiber wool with a belt and a midi flare sits over a lace dress without crushing it. For a rooftop in October, the Teal Floral Jacquard Light Coat, Emma, is lighter.
Decide your role, then your room, then the shoe, and the dress will follow. The wedding guest dresses and jumpsuits hold the guest pieces, blazers and pants hold the ivory suit and the navy column, and complete size runs are listed first in each.
Continue reading
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- What to Wear to Your First Big Client Dinner as a Woman
- What to Wear to Your Own Engagement Party
What a rehearsal dinner is, and who comes
A rehearsal dinner is the meal held after the ceremony run through, usually the evening before the wedding. The couple, both sets of parents, the wedding party, the officiant and their partners are the usual guests. Some couples also invite out of town family and close friends.
The dinner is smaller and warmer than the wedding. You will talk to the same 20 to 50 people for 3 hours, so choose an outfit you can sit in, stand in and hug in.
What to wear at each level of formality
Casual or backyard dinners call for a midi dress or a blazer with wide leg pants, and a block heel or a polished flat that will not sink into grass.
Cocktail dinners, the most common card, call for a knee to midi dress in a fabric with weight. The Olga wrap dress is knee length, has short sleeves, and closes with gold tone buttons under a buckled belt. It sits well beside a navy suit at the next seat. You can see more lengths in the cocktail dresses collection.
Semi formal or black tie optional dinners call for a longer hem or richer fabric. The evening dresses collection holds the longer options. The rehearsal dinner and bridal shower outfits collection gathers the pieces we pick for this occasion.
Colors to wear and colors to skip
Navy, deep green, bordeaux and black are safe at almost every rehearsal dinner. Skip white, ivory and cream unless you are the person getting married. Ask the couple for the wedding colors, and avoid the exact shade the bridesmaids will wear the next day.
In low restaurant light, a solid dark color with some texture photographs better than a flat one. The Lucy jacquard blazer has a woven pattern in the fabric and closes with a single decorative clasp, so the texture does the work that a print would do.
When pants or a blazer are the better choice
Pants suit a rooftop, a windy patio and any dinner where you will be on your feet. The Greta wide leg pants sit high on the waist and have a wrap front panel that crosses the hip, with silver eyelets at the side. Add the Lucy blazer above and you have a dark column that reads as evening. You can browse the blazers collection and the pants collection for more combinations.
What to leave at home
Leave denim, work clothes you would wear unchanged to the office, and anything more formal than the wedding itself at home. Skip a stiletto on grass or old wood floors, and skip a print louder than the table flowers.
If the weather turns
A light coat suits an autumn evening, and you can find several in the light coats collection. From November, a wool coat with a waist suits the walk from the car to the door, and the winter coats collection has them.
More questions about the rehearsal dinner
What should I wear to a rehearsal dinner if the invitation has no dress code?
Wear a knee length or midi dress, or a blazer with wide leg pants, in a deep color. The Navy Wrap Dress, Olga, at $695 is one example. Semi formal is the safe reading, and you can ask the host or the couple if you want to be sure.
Who is invited to a rehearsal dinner?
The couple, their parents, the wedding party, the officiant and their partners are the usual guest list. Some couples add out of town family and close friends. If you are on the list, you are close to the couple, so dress to look warm and polished rather than formal.
Is a rehearsal dinner more formal than the wedding?
No. The rehearsal dinner sits one step below the wedding. If the wedding is black tie, the dinner is often cocktail. If the wedding is cocktail, the dinner is often dressy casual or semi formal.
Can I wear a jumpsuit to a rehearsal dinner?
Yes, in a dark color and a fabric with some weight. A jumpsuit suits a rooftop or a buffet where you will be standing and moving. You can look through the Luna jumpsuits collection for options.
What colors should I avoid at a rehearsal dinner?
Avoid white, ivory and cream unless you are the person getting married. Check the wedding colors with the couple, and do not wear the shade the bridesmaids will wear the next day. Navy, green, bordeaux and black are safe at most dinners.
What should I wear to a rehearsal dinner or bridal shower?
For a rehearsal dinner, wear a midi in a deep color such as the Navy Jacquard Midi Dress, Lucy at $695, woven from 80% cotton and 20% structured technical crepe with a breathable botanical lining. A bridal shower is usually a daytime party, so a lighter print suits it, and the Floral Elegant Midi Dress, Amanda at $695 is a fully lined midi in 100% breathable botanical fiber.
- The Navy Jacquard Midi Dress, Lucy, $695, is a tonal jacquard that falls below the knee, with sheer navy 3/4 sleeves.
- The Navy Wrap Dress, Olga, $695, is a knee length navy wrap with notched lapels, gold-tone buttons down the overlap and a belt with a gold-tone buckle.
- The Burgundy Lace Cocktail Dress, Jody, $550, is European lace in deep bordeaux over a fitted underlining, cut knee length with short lace sleeves.
- The Floral Elegant Midi Dress, Amanda, $695, is a sleeveless cream midi with a watercolor print of orange, pink and coral flowers, and it suits a garden shower.
- The Pink Elegant Midi Dress, Charlotte, $595, is fuchsia with elbow length sleeves, a softly pleated skirt, side pockets and a wide belt with a black sculpted buckle.
- The Navy Floral Elegant Midi Dress, Julia, $695, is an A-line midi with short sheer sleeves and an ivory bodice printed with pink and purple flowers.
Our model is 5 foot 9 and wears a size 2, so compare where the hem lands on her with your own height, and take your measurements against the sizing guide before you order. Shipping within the US is free and takes 2 to 5 days, and every dress has 30-day returns with no questions asked.
Read on with the rehearsal dinner outfit for the mother of the bride, what to wear to your own engagement party and the engagement party outfit for the mother. Browse the rehearsal dinner and bridal shower outfits or the wedding guest dresses and jumpsuits.
